Mon parcours BDSM

22 Janvier 2026

Voilà une phrase classique dans le monde du BDSM, que les gens se posent fréquemment mutuellement : "du coup comment tu t'es intéressé-e au BDSM ?", et bien sûr tout le monde a envie d'entendre des anecotes kinky, croustillantes, voire profondes. Je me prête volontiers au jeu. Mes clients me demandent régulièrement ce qui m'a fait entrer dans tout cela, je ne sais jamais si le sujet est plutôt la partie BSM ou la partie payante, ou un peu des deux... mais laissez-moi satisfaire votre curiosité et vous parler un peu de "mon parcours BDSM !"

And here I am, about to write about it and here comes the blank. Where should I start? The fact that I always pretty much loved sex and decided I wanted to dive deeper into it? The fact that when a friend of mine told me about her cooking naked for a rich man and then jerking him off for money got me aroused? Or the fact that the same friend told me about a queer porn being shot in Germany and me ending up flying from Latin America to Cologne straight into the first orgy of my life realizing I actually loved being spanked hard?

It is definitely a bit of everything but what I am sure of is that I felt so relaxed and full of pleasure when I did all this that I wanted to dig deeper.

This orgy was actually mind opening. The watching and being watched. The pain and the pleasure. Collective moaning. I had a bathroom break in the middle and told myself that I wanted to do that everyday if possible. It confirmed my choice to come to Amsterdam to try escorting. What better than the Netherlands to start off this kind of career? Well I thought it would be easier, that I could get guided. Instead I was told I couldn’t do things officially because you know laws are not made to actually make you independent but rather tied to a third party keeping half of your income. So I looked for fellow worker trying to get tips from them. It worked, I got tips and my first shibari session. Hands tied up in my back I discovered the feeling of releasing power into someone hands and letting them play with my body and my mind.

I kept digging and found workshops where I could learn how to dirty talk, how to fist, how to flog, how to touch someone and ask for consent. I participated in orgies mingling with queer folks, got flogged in front of a crowd and played in dark rooms. I made films, between kinky and documentary. And even organized a sex positive festival in the end.

At the same time I found my way to get paid for sharing sex and wit. More and more I found vanilla interactions a bit boring. I am a switch but I don’t submit to people I don’t know and who feel entitled to do whatever they want because they paid. That is not how consent works. This is not how BDSM works, even in a paid context. The money does not determine what you can and cannot do, the agreement does even if some practices require higher pricing. That is still part of the agreement made between you and me.

When I moved to Brussels to keep doing activism I got paid to work towards better rights for my fellow workers. The institutional machinery got me and burnt me out. With the pain inside my skin and the money needed for care I decided to come back to BDSM, this place where pain co-exist with pleasure, this moment when the agreement between us is stronger than anything happening outside. I wanted to be the one in control, operating through your body, using all the skills acquired for years to bring you into an experience similar to the ones I had lived already. I wanted to make sure you forget your rational mind, you become sensations and most importantly that you can trust me to also dive deeper.